Life At The Airport

Life at the airport. Life in line. Life is a giant queue.

As I stand in line at the infamous Hard Eight BBQ in Coppell, Texas, I realize I’ve been doing a lot of it lately. Standing in line at airport security, standing in line at a restaurant, standing in line at the million opportunities queuing up. Life is standing in line at the airport, with each plane an opportunity missed or taken.

Sure there’s the adage of taking life by the horns, the no bars rule to seize an opportunity and not simply wait for something to happen. However, I believe sometimes you must wait for that perfect opportunity, sometimes you’re just not ready. It’s like jumping on a moving carousel, you have to wait for the perfect open spot to jump in. In many ways life has been a matter of finding my footing. There have been many squandered opportunities in my past, career-wise and personal growth. I’ve paid dearly for a lot of it, but I’m finally starting to get to that point where I feel I know what I want and where I want to go. There’s still a lot of broken pieces to put together, still a lot of embedded shards to remove from my broken past, but I know what must be done.

Life in Texas has been all right. It’s made me realize a few things.

  1. I made the right decision in moving to Seattle. There has never been a bigger affirmation of this. I’ve missed home tremendously. I’ve missed the weather, the people, and my friends. Don’t get me wrong, Texas isn’t all that bad. Certainly the fact that sweet tea is served in place of water at every restaurant has its charm. Then there’s that southern hospitality. Gifts, dinners, tours of Texas have all been offered and I’m ever so humbled and grateful. However, for me, Washington is home. Seattle is where my heart is.
  2. I’m TeleCom for life. I thought I was going to be in this industry for a year or two; another passing job. This will be my 10th year and I’m pretty sure I can say this is where I’m going to retire from.
  3. Never have I felt like the “prettiest girl at the ball” with so many possibilities in my career path. I don’t know where I’ll land after this project. I hope it’s somewhere new and exciting.

As I wait in line at the car rental lot, the woman ahead of me smiles. She’s got two phones in hand and a blue tooth piece in each ear. She’s dressed nicely, in a slim white suit.

“Business or pleasure?” she asks.

“Business.”

She smiles. “I figured.”

“Oh?”

“It’s the look of ‘I can’t wait to go home'” she says.

“You?” I ask. “Are you going home or…?”

She nods. “Home. For now.”

“I feel ya,” I said. “I’m going home for 36 hours and then I have to be back.”

“You in IT or programming?”

“A little in between. Telecom.”

“Ah, well,” she tips her phone in my general direction. “We thank you for keeping us connected.”

This is my life; I mumble to myself. It’s all a line… a timeline of events.

A welcome basket given by local management upon my arrival.

A welcome basket given by local management upon my arrival.

The lovely Veronica from Washington put together a home-sick package. LOVE IT!

The lovely Veronica from Washington put together a home-sick package. LOVE IT!

An awesome local bar with outdoor seating and a basketball court.

An awesome local bar with outdoor seating and a basketball court.

Straight guys play with a gay couple. Complete strangers. Yup. It happens.

Straight guys play with a gay couple. Complete strangers. Yup. It happens.

 

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Staging

Nothing is without a sacrifice. Tangible or not, almost everything seems to carry a heavy tax; time. Whether we pay entirely in time, or it’s levied, time is paid. This much has become apparent. The day job never really let up around this time last year. I thought the hectic period was temporary, but I was wrong. Then again, my efforts at work weren’t in vain. I’ve been given a lot of opportunities, all of which I’m very grateful for. And although I’m content, I miss writing. I’ve said this before. These last few entries have pretty much been around the same thing; how much I miss writing, and how busy work is.

And so it comes down to a few things; desire, dedication, and time management.

I know one can finish a novel in a year. I know of people that can write MANY novels in a year. They have hectic busy schedules too, they have personal obligations, they have a regular life. It can be done.

Deadlines, when it comes to art–when it comes to writing, has never been my forte. Heck, I’ve written at how discouraging NaNoWriMo can be for me since I just can’t handle that sort of pressure. I fall word counts behind and then it just snowballs. I can never catch up and the whole thing goes up in flames out of frustration.

Enough lollygagging.

Even though structure, even within the NaNo deadline and daily goals, have not worked, perhaps I should give it another try. I mean, structure works for me when it comes to outline. I LOVE outlining, even if I don’t follow it completely in the end. Sometimes the story flow changes as I write and I allow myself room for that. A friend of mine, Jeffe Kennedy, teases that my outlining is a form of procrastination. I have no doubt it is, but not always. It does help me. It allows me to see overall themes and story. Everything is else comes naturally. That’s where the ‘art’ comes in.

New year resolutions have never been my thing, so I won’t say that’s what this is. However, I hold on to hope that I’m able to pick up new habits. I have a planner for next year and a “writer’s companion” book to help keep me on track. Plus, I have a wonderful gift from Marcella on “the 90-day novel.” I’m optimistic.

Next year will be a challenge. I’m set to train in Texas for a few months. I’ll miss Seattle TREMENDOUSLY, but I also hope my time spent in a lonely hotel will keep me focused. Hopefully I come out of this with a couple novels. Everything is pending. It’s all staging.

2016

Posted in Rants/Musings, The Writer In Me | 2 Comments