Exile

Breathe!

That’s what I keep telling myself as I start to write this. I just talked with my friend Sebastian from WA. Seems that things up in WA have been busy since my last visit. Remember the one visit? The whole drama with NavyBoy, Kyle and Katie?

Well, get ready for an update!

Turns out the problems that Kyle and Katie were having finally took a nasty turn. They’ve separated. Katie moved out and in with her parents. She’s filed divorce and asking for just about everything from Kyle, including support. It turns out in all of this that NavyBoy and Katie were an item since about December. Crazy right?

I have to be honest that I’m not surprised. I remember NavyBoy hiding text messages from me when I was up there. It seemed odd. But, let me assure that I wasn’t a snoop either. If I were to glance in NavyBoy’s direction while he was sending one of the ‘secret’ texts he’d make a very obvious attempt to hide it from me. It was like a child just begging for attention. It did spark my interest and I noticed those texts being received by Katie on our trip to Leavenworth. I sorta dismissed it but I had my suspicious something was going on. Navyboy’s ambiguous sexuality was one of the other things that bugged me about him. (apart from the self-destructive behavior).

“He’s just a snake,” Sebastian describes as he updates me on events.

He is. Among other things.

“Be honest, is he hot? Is he cute?” Sebastian inquires.

“What do you mean?” I wasn’t sure what he was getting at.

“A lot of woman like him, and I mean a lot.”

“He’s charming.”

“Really?” Sebastian’s a bit surprised. “I mean, I’m old enough to be secure in my sexuality and I can appreciate this guy or that guy; admitting he’s a handsome man, but NavyBoy?”

“He’s charming, in an asshole kinda way,” I struggle to explain. “We’re complete opposites, he’s nothing like me. But, there was something about him.”

Sebastian doesn’t really get it and I don’t expect him to. We argue for a brief moment on whether he’s a good person; I obviously don’t see him as a good person. Sebastian for some reason still likes him. He has this sort of pity for him; his harsh upbringing, the cancer thing, he doesn’t really have many friends, blah blah blah.

“Yeah, I fell for all that,” I admit. “But he’s very self-destructive. You can’t save someone that doesn’t want to be saved. He’s checked out.”

Somehow Kyle found these receipts and gas cards Katie had been using to visit NavyBoy (Now that he’s moved to Portland, OR). I’m not sure how long this thing had been going on but I’m sure it was starting when I was around. I do recall one morning where NavyBoy left with Katie, she was dropping him off at his house. Granted, it didn’t take too long… but well… you know. It was strange.

But seriously. I think it was the secret texting and the fact that Katie had made a remark to Kyle and Kyle told me, that Katie had been wanting to sleep with NavyBoy. NavyBoy I think mentioned something about Katie, but I can’t recall details.

What a dysfunctional situation!

Sebastian I think enjoys the drama more than I do. No seriously. I know it comes as a surprise to some of you. But he keeps bringing things up where he wants me back into all this.

“So, I’m not sure if this situation changes things and you have pity on Kyle,” Sebastian begins. “Or NavyBoy.”

“What?” I quickly ask. It’s sometimes hard to pick up on his odd humor. “No. I don’t want back into that. I don’t ever want to talk to either of them. They’ve got their own drama.”

Who knows whats going to happen. The thing with Katie doesn’t surprise me. She had sorta checked out and I’m sure Kyle had as well on some level. Katie’s offer to hop into the shower with me last time should’ve been an indicator. Oh, her desire to sleep with me. Remember that email? I also forgot to mention I woke up one morning with her on top of me. It honestly scared me, she got a laugh though :-\

That of course prompts the memory of my friend WEST saying, “If I ever get a call from you crying and saying you got raped by a woman, I’m gonna have a real hard time not laughing.”

In another story:

Sebastian and Violet are still having problems. Sebastian swears that most of the items have been ironed out; for which I’m glad. Still, the previous dreams loom over my head and on the edge of my tongue. But, I wont tell him. I’m actually glad I’ll be spending most of my time with Mary, another friend who has been drama free, lol. Sebastian of course would want me to spend more time there, but I seriously don’t want to intrude. Besides, I’ll be there for quite a while if I do end up moving there.

There are still no set of employers I’ll be checking out. Not yet at least. I should probably research a few and prepare for possible interviews. You’d think that with all this going on I’d have second-thoughts. I don’t. I’m happier up there than I have ever been down here in SoCal. It is time for a change. Who knows, I may return eventually, I expect that may happen and don’t fight it. For now I feel like an exile, I must leave to return some other time.

Ah, to return to Seattle…